Picking Myself up, or trying to anyway...

Lately I have been feeling really lost and empty as well as being in pain, physically and emotionally. I believe that something is going on with my health, more than usual. I have this weird swelling going on, unbelievable swelling, and it gets very painful. My legs, feet, ankles and hands swell grotesquely, I mean huge! I can't walk, I wobble, and it feels as if the skin is ripping off my body with the stretching! It burns and itches. I just don't know what is causing it!
Due to lack of medical insurance, I am unable to get to a doctor. I 'make to much' to receive any kind of aid, and I am simply one of those people left out. If things keep going like this, I am going to head to the ER as I am getting scared of what's going on with me.
The emotional pain is much harder to deal with and explain. I am simply lost. I feel as if I am in this giant, dark pit and though I know there is a way out, I can't find it. I don't know which way to turn, which way to move, so, I stand still, in the darkness. I have come to a point that all I can think to do is to pray. I don't even know what to pray for really though. I am simply going to pray and ask God to help me out of this place I am in. That is all I can do.
I am worried about some friends...Denise, whom I love dearly, who seems so down and blue...I wish you didn't feel that way, I understand, and I would take it from you if I could! Sandra, in the path of Gustav, I fear for you and pray for you. For Jan, also in Gustav's path...May God keep you both safe from harm!
I guess that's about it for now. Not very exciting or inspiring.
Mental out